Literary Analysis of "Marriage is a Private Affair" by Chinua Achebe

"Marriage is a Private Affair" by Chinua Achebe is a short story that tells the struggles between tradition and modern times. Nnaemeka moved to a modern city in Nigeria and met a woman named Nene. Nnaemaka's father, Okeke, grew up in a very traditional village and refuses to accept his son's chosen bride-to-be. In Okeke's village, the parents are to choose the children's spouses. Due to Nnaemeka's choice, Okeke does not speak to his son for eight years, and misses out on many important events. This post is going to analyze the theme, setting, plot, point of view, characterization, irony, and symbolism.

Theme

There are many themes in this short story, but the one that stands out is that family is more important than tradition. Okeke grew up and lived in the rural Ibo village all his life. He is a strict christian and follows his village's traditional values. He is so attuned in the old ways that he cannot see past them for his son. Nnaemeka moved to Lagos (a modern city in Nigeria) and was exposed to modern thoughts about marriage and did not obey the Ibo village values.

The story starts with Nene asking if Nnaemeka has written to dad about them being engaged. Nnaemeka is reluctant to send a letter with that kind of news, he would rather tell his father in person. He also did not want to send a letter because his father already sent a letter saying he found the perfect wife for him. Nnaemeka instead went to his father's home in the village and told him that he does not want to marry the girl his father picked. He then told Okeke that he is engaged to Nene, a non-Ibo woman.

His father became enraged, sent his son away, and refused to eat that night. After calming down for a day, Okeke asked for his son to come back so they could talk. Okeke tried to persuade Nnaemeka to call it quits with Nene, but he refused. Okeke said he would never accept Nene and stopped talking to his son for eight years. He missed their wedding and the birth of his two grandsons. The grandsons were told they had a grandfather and they wanted to meet Okeke. No matter how hard he tried to not care about the two boys, he was finally seeing that they were more important that his traditional values.

Setting

The main setting is Okeke's home in the Ibo village in rural Nigeria. The time is maybe the 1940's or 1950's which is before the internet, hence the letter writing. There are no details on how the home looks, but is where most of the story takes place. The cultural context is that Nnaemeka is expected to obey his father and marry the girl his father picked. The mood throughout the story is tense. Okeke and Nnaekmeka disagreeing, Okeke acting like his son did not exist for eight years give proof on why the mood is tense.

Plot

The first minor conflict is that Nnaemeka wants to marry Nene, against his father's wishes. In his father's tribe, he was to choose his son's spouse, but Nnaemeka does not care for the tribe's traditions. Even after all the arguing, Nnaemeka still marries Nene, without his father's blessing.

The second minor conflict is that Nene is not an Ibo woman. The tribe's tradition also says that the spouse has to be from the tribe or they won't be accepted or respected. She is a school teacher, and in the bible that Okeke worships says that women should not be able to teach.

The third conflict is that Okeke totally rejects Nnaekmeka and Nene getting married. He is so stuck in the old ways of thinking that he cannot see past it. Okeke sends his son away again but does not ask him to come back. To get over his shock, he starts talking with the other tribes men, who think just like he does. They also cannot believe what they are hearing, one even suggested Okeke to call a native doctor to check Nnaemeka to see if he was sick in the head.

All the minor conflicts help fuel the rising action, which is the eight long years that Okeke does not speak to his son. Nene and Nnaemeka were married and were very happy being together, the tribe's people caught wind of their relationship, but Okeke did not. Whenever he heard his son's name, he became angry, so the tribe's people gave up on trying to tell him.

The major conflict is tradition. Okeke grew up and lived in his village his whole life, probably never took one step out of it. The values and traditions are ingrained in his mind, and he can't get over them for his own flesh and blood. He let them overtake his love for Nnaemeka and his happiness.

The climax is when Okeke received a letter from Nene. Her and Nnaemeka had two sons, and the boys wanted to meet their grandfather. Nene said she would stay where she is, and she hoped that Okeke would would meet his grandsons.

The falling action is Okeke thinking about his grandsons. He tired to fight the feelings he was starting to feel about them, but he couldn't fight it. The weather didn't help him either. After some time without any rain, it started pouring. Rainy days make people feel gloomy or at ease, but also helps people think. The resolution of the story is that Okeke regretted missing those eight years, all the memories and happiness he could've felt. He felt scared that he might die before making it up to all of them.

Point of View

The point of view in this story is third person omniscient. The story is told from all the characters, except the grandsons. We know what Nene, Naemeka, and Okeke's thoughts and feelings. We know that Nnaemeka was sad from Okeke's rejection even though he had no dialog for it, and we read Okeke's internal battle with his feelings for his grandsons and his values. This is a great point of view, we learn all the character's feelings and thoughts, and the struggle they are going through.

Characterization

Nnaemeka is a round character. He goes against his father to make his own life decisions. He is like a real person trying to figure out life. Though a round character, he is static. He made his decision to marry Nene and would not budge from it.

Nene is also a round character. She wanted to bring Okeke into the family even though Nnaemeka warned her of how he would be to the news. Like Nnaemeka, she is static also. She gave up on trying to bring Okeke into the family and went on living her life.

Okeke is a round character. Though a strict believer in the bible and the traditions, he still acted like a real person, almost like a spoiled child not getting his way. At the end of the story, he had an epiphany, which made him a evolving character. He learns that his family should had been more important that the traditions, and he had to make it up to his family that he had hurt all those years.

The author uses indirect characterization to show how all the characters treat and think of each other. They also describe the actions of the characters, and the thoughts of why they chose to act in that way. This characterization has shown the struggles between the characters and how they think.

Irony

The title "Marriage is a Private Affair" is an example of verbal irony. Their marriage isn't private at all. The people in Lagos talk about how happy Nene and Nnaemeka are, and the gossip travels to Okeke's village. The men in the Ibo village talk about how Okeke should send for a native doctor to check on Nnaemeka. The marriage is the talk of Lagos and the Ibo village.

An example of situational irony is when Okeke rejected Nene. Usually fathers are happy that their sons found someone special, but Okeke proved the readers wrong. He even went to disowning his son because he was so angry.

The example of dramatic irony is when Okeke gives in to his feelings for his grandsons. The readers know he gave in but Nene, Naemeka, and the grandsons do not know yet.

Symbol

The rain that came at the end of the story is the symbol. It represents change and washing and washing away. It had not rained that whole year, but it rained the day Okeke received the letter regarding the grandsons. His resentment towards his son's family was was washed away, just like the rain was washing the land. His life was dry and lifeless just like the land, but now the rain came and brought life back.

This story was a good read, I would give it a 8/10. I would have loved to read Okeke meeting the grandsons and apologizing to Nene and Nnaemeka. But the story did send a message to the readers, family is more important. The story was family oriented, happy and sad, and almost like real life family problems.

 Someone who enjoys family drama will enjoy this story. But there are some who would not enjoy this story, the names are not common and maybe the problem in this story would hit a certain nerve wrong. Also, the locations of the story are not very descriptive, so the reader has to guess what they look life. Though there are a few weaknesses, this story was a very good read.

3 Product Reviews

L' Oreal Paris Colour Riche Eyeliner Black

 Before eyeliner, I used to make cat eyes with black eye shadow (that was fun),  but I decided to try using eyeliner. After a couple years of trying to find a decent eyeliner, I came across this pencil eyeliner at a Walgreens I always shop at. The pencil design is very distinctive, black with metallic gold, and it caught my attention quickly It has been my go to eyeliner for four years now. I'm not very fond of liquid eyeliner because it runs very easy, and is too shiny for me.

Why I like it/ Upsides

• It applies on smooth and easy.

• Cream type eyeliner.

• Applies on well even if there is other make-up on eye.

• Great at making cat eyes.

• Keeps its shape all day.

• Wipes off easy when you want to take it off.

• It's a fairly long pencil, it lasts awhile, unless you wear eyeliner everyday.

• Always sharpens to a point.

The cat eye I did with the eyeliner.

Why I don't like it/ Downsides

• Smudges easily.

• ONLY SOLD online now. No longer in stores. But it did become cheaper from being sold online.

• If you mess up too much, you have to remove all of it and start over.

• Pencil is kind of slippery to hold.

Though there a few downsides to the eyeliner, I highly recommend this for beginners in the make-up world. It comes off easy if you don't like the shape you drew on, but be careful, if you mess up too much, you will have to reapply all the eyeliner on your eye to make it look decent. Even if you have eyes shadow applied to your eyelid, the eyeliner applies like there is nothing there. I am kind of sad that I can't buy this eyeliner in stores, it was more convenient rather to waiting a couple weeks for a new eyeliner pencil to come in the mail.

Maybelline Volum' Express® The Colossal Mascara

I have tried many types of mascara, but none have made my eyelashes the way I wanted them. Then I decided to try this big, yellow mascara tube. I was skeptical at first, but this mascara did wonders to my eyelashes. They became longer and looked thicker, and I finally had the eyelashes I wanted. 

$6.99

Why I like it/ Upsides

• Makes lashes longer and thicker.

• Comes off easy with water.

• Lasts all day.

• Made in U.S.A

• Only takes two coats to get thick lashes.

• Brush is thick and holds a lot of mascara.

 Why I don't like it/ Downsides

• Clumps up on eyelashes. (I use an old dry, cleaned mascara brush to get rid of the clumps.)

• Flakes sometimes fall onto my face.

• Handle is too short and bulky to get a good grip.

• A little bit expensive for one tube, but you get what you pay for.

This mascara is great, but should not be used by beginners. The brush is very thick, and for someone who doesn't know how to apply mascara could hurt themselves. Only experienced make-up appliers should use this mascara, and be prepared with something to smooth out the clumps.

Biore Pore Deep Cleansing Strips

Like everyone else, I have clogged pores. Does not matter how hygienic you are, you still will get dirt, oil, and sweat into your pores. My nose is the worst, it's covered in clogged pores, but since finding these strips, my nose has become cleaner. You apply the strip by wetting your nose (or forehead, it sticks there too), and putting the sticky part of strip onto moist area for 10-15 minutes. After 10-15 minutes go by and the strip is dry and hard, peel the strip off, and see the satisfying results.

What the strips look like.

Why I like it/ Upsides

$9.99

• Rips out gunk in pores.

• Leaves area feeling smooth.

• Less face oil in area.

• Pores less noticeable.  Rips out unwanted hair.

Why I don't like it/ Downsides

• Strips hurt to remove.

• Leaves area red.

• Sometimes doesn't rip anything out.

• Leaves white crust on nose bridges.

• Expensive for one box.

This product helps treat the blackhead plague on faces by removing unwanted substances from the pores. Seeing the gunk taken out is so satisfying, it'll make you want to keep sticking more of the strips on, but you have to wait three days to reapply a strip, or it will leave your skin irritated and sensitive. I recommend this product to anyone with a clogged pore problem and wants some relief.

Three Influential People

My grandma and Papa.

Someone who has influenced me:

My grandma has always been my role model. She's worked hard to get where she is today. Born and raised in Southwest Detroit, or more specifically Delray. Her mother passed away at a young age, so she had to raise her four other sibling, she is the second eldest of five. Later, she graduated from Southwestern High School, and had a daughter in 1976 (my mother). She was a single parent, but she took care of what was needed to provide for her child and herself. A few years later, she met the love of her life. They had a son together in 1980, and then were married in 1987. She found the one thing everyone looks for, someone to help you build up your life. While working full-time and being a mother, she went to college. She first attended Detroit College of Business and received her undergrad degree. At Wayne State University, she majored in Information and Records Management, and later received her Masters in Library and Information Science. Some of the places she worked at was the Joe Louis Arena as a Computer Operator, Great Lakes Bancorp as a Records Retention Specialist, and worked at a law firm that handled asbestos class action litigation. Currently, she is working at a major law firm located in the Renaissance Center in Downtown, Detroit. I look up to her, she is the example I want to follow. She overcame all her obstacles and is living a great life. She has five beautiful granddaughters and a loving husband whom she has been married to for 29 years. She is one of the reasons I am going to college, I want to be as successful in life as she is. She always encourages me to do my very best, no matter what I'm up against.

Mrs Johnson and her husband.

Someone who has influenced many:  

Mrs .Johnson has been a Kumon Instructor for 17 years. She has her Masters in English and received her teaching degree at Madonna University. She opened her first Kumon center in August 1999, and then the second in April 2002. Since then, she has helped over 2,000 students learn how to read and comprehend what they read at a quicker pace, and become better at figuring out math problems. I became a student of hers when I was in 2nd grade, and now I'm an employee. If it wasn't for her constant encouragement that I can figure out the problems in front of me, I wouldn't be as intelligent as I am today. All these years at Kumon, I've watched struggling students catch up to their grade level in a few months, and some even go further, and it's all because of Mrs. Johnson. And now, my younger cousin and little sister are enrolled into Kumon, I always tell them that Kumon will help them in the future. Any child can come into one her centers and learn, no matter how smart or inadequate they are. She believes every child has the potential to become smarter than they are. By becoming better with reading and math, the child's self-esteem goes up, and they'll want to learn more. Every year, she holds an award ceremony to give trophies to the children to show that they are special and deserve to be rewarded for their efforts. The children's smiles are from ear to ear when they receive their trophy, and they run to show their parents. I appreciate everything she does to help these children reach their potential and show them how smart they can actually be. 

Someone who has influenced the world: 

Walt Disney was born December 5, 1901, in Hermosa, Illinois. He was one out of five children. He mostly grew up in Missouri and this is where he started drawing and painting. He later went back to Illinois and took drawing and photography classes at Mckinley High School. He also was a cartoonist for the school's paper, and took night classes at Chicago Art Institute. At 16, he joined the Red Cross and went to France to help with the war and drove an ambulance for a year. In 1919, he moved to Kansas City, Missouri and started working at Kansas City Film Ad Company where he made commercials with animating cutouts. He later made a studio of his own called Laugh-O-Gram, but in 1923 it had to be shut down due to debt. After rounding up some money, Walt and his brother moved to Hollywood, California and started the Disney Brothers' Studio. After being betrayed by a distributor. they lost their first cartoons and animators. Walt, his brother, his wife, and a trusted cartoonist, created Mickey Mouse. They created short silent films with Mickey, and also put sound, music, and voices in the films. Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy and Pluto were made in 1929. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was the first ever full-length film, and it produced $1.499 million dollars. After Snow White, Walt was mostly focused on making movies. On July 17, 1955 Disneyland was built in Anaheim, California. People come from around the world to see the Disney characters come to life. He began plans to open a theme park in Florida, but before he could see it finished, he died of lung cancer at 65 on December 15, 1966. His brother finished the plans, and Disney World was built and then finished in 1971. Mary Poppins was the last work Walt looked over before his death. He and his animators brought joy to the world with their cartoons. He overcame all the problems in his way and now his name will live on forever.

Top 10 Movies

Who doesn't love watching movies? These are my utmost favorite 10 movies that I could never get tired of seeing.

1) Sleeping Beauty has always been my favorite Disney princess.

When I was younger, I would watch this movie like if my life depended on it. This is the only princess movie with a prince fighting a dragon. I love how her dress changes colors due to the fairies, Flora and Merryweather, fighting over what color is better. Merryweather is mine and my mom's favorite character in the movie, she makes us laugh every time we watch the movie. I have an old doll of Aurora that is still in the box, and quite a few figurines. Every time a new edition of the movie came out, my mom bought me it, so i might have five editions of the same movie. To add onto my love of this princess, she is also my boyfriend's favorite princess. He surprised me when he told me this, He came up with the idea for our future wedding cake, that it will have the dragon on it. and when we cut the cake, he'll be slaying a dragon for me.

 2) Land Before Time is the reason I love dinosaurs. I watched this movie many time, but not as much as Sleeping Beauty. I wanted to learn about dinosaurs, I had many dinosaur toys, and the Barbies I did have were the food to my giant robot T-Rex. This story reminds me of my life. Little Foot's (main character) grandparents raised him after his mother passed away, and he never met his father. Growing up, I was mostly was with my grandparents because my mom worked midnight shifts, so I didn't see her as much. I don't remember my dad, he passed away when I was two or three.

Little Foot and his grandparents.

 

3) Oh man, Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron was the other movie that I watched way too much. Other than dinosaurs, horses are a love of mine. Anything with a horse in it, I either read, watched, or played it. It was either this or Sleeping Beauty being played on the T.V. This movie is great, there's humor, sadness, epic chases, and the facial expressions are the funniest I have ever seen.

Just an example of the expressions.

4) I'm a huge fantasy genre fan, and the Lord of the Rings trilogy is the best in my opinion. I remember when I was younger, my Papa (grandpa) played the movies, and I never got up from my seat. I was so entranced by the magic, elves, battle scenes, etc. Still to this day, I have movie marathons of the trilogy, and now since The Hobbit (the story that started it all) was also made, I don't leave my house. I have so much merchandise, the Ring on my car keys, way too many shirts, a lifesize Legolas cutout, a Gandalf staff, plushie, and beard, and a charm bracelet. That's most of the stuff I have, there's just too much to list.

My charm bracelet, and me with my Gandalf beard and Legolas. I was having a movie marathon.

5) Legend is another fantasy movie. My favorite animal is the unicorn. Unicorns top dinosaurs and horses. This movie is beautiful and scary. There's glitter everywhere! There's two unicorns that are being hunted by a huge, red monster that looks like the devil but isn't. He still creeps me out.

The two unicorns.

6) Another unicorn movie is The Last Unicorn. This is a beautiful and sad story. The last unicorn searches for her lost family that was stolen by a greedy King and his huge Red Bull (kind of like Legend). She makes friends on her journey, and to escape the Red Bull, she had to be turned into a human. She was so pretty. She eventually freed her family by fighting back against the King and the Red Bull in her returned unicorn form. I had my boyfriend watch this one day with me, and he loved it too.

$349.99 

7) Labyrinth is another glitter filled fantasy movie that I enjoy watching. Sarah (main character) reminds me of myself. She's very much into fantasy world type stories just like I am. David Bowie was the best choice to be the Goblin King. Sometime later, I want to get the Goblin King statue, but it's super expensive. So I will have to stick with my t-shirts for the time being.

Sarah and the Goblin King

8) Back to another dinosaur trilogy. The Jurassic Park three movie trilogy. When I was young, the dinosaurs looked so real. I have the original movies from when it was first being sold. I got so excited when the newest movie came out, Jurassic World, that I had to go see it. In the move, the old park building was in there, and I started hitting my best friend in the theater because I was so excited.

This building is the one in the new movie. I can remember that banner anywhere.

9) I love video games, and my favorite series is called Dynasty Warriors. I always thought it was just made up characters and story, but then I found out these were real people and events in China. And then I found out there was a movie called Red Cliff that is the story of a huge battle in the game and in real life in the past. I had to watch it. To see my favorite characters come alive on the screen is a great feeling. Even though some scenes are exaggerated, it's still a great movie.

10) Finally, my last favorite movie. Journey to the West is a comedic movie remake to the book Journey to the West, a very old Chinese literary classic. I was scrolling through Netflix one night, and me being a Kung Fu movie fanatic found this. I didn't realize this was a comedy, I laughed throughout the whole movie. The next day I made my boyfriend watch it since he like Kung Fu movies also. He was laughing as much as I did. And come to find out, there's a sequel coming out in 2017, I can't wait.

This would the main character.

 

Me by the numbers

There are many numbers that are meaningful to me, but I'm going to only the share the top 4.

The first number is 20. I am 20 years old, and my mom had me at 20 years old. So we are 20 years apart. She has that 'never ages' gene, and no stranger believes we are mother and daughter. They say we look like sisters or friends. I'll purposely yell 'Mom' when we're in public just to see people's reactions, and my mom will say "shh don't say that word" or "shut up Anna", but that only makes me say it louder.

I'm surprised we even took a decent
picture, most of them are of us being silly.

All the grandkids on the left, with 2 of my grandparents, and on the right, 2 more of my grandparents, sadly I don't have a picture of my great-grandma.

The second number is 5. This number is the most reoccurring for some odd reason. I have 5 grandparents, one of them being a great-grandma, 5 friends who have been with me since middle school, born in May, the 5th month, and I'm the eldest of 5 grandchildren. But my best friend and I have been partners in crime for 5 years. She is my other half. She has seen me on my best and absolute worst days. My grandparents and my parents have adopted her into the family. We used to be together all the time, but now we have more responsibilities that take up most of our time to hang out.

 The third number is 2. This number also shows itself multiple times. I have 2 younger sisters, Alyssa is 9 and Amelia is 2 ( turning 3 in October). Good job mom, on the age differences between your kids. And I have 2 younger cousins. It has been 2 years since I graduated high school. I have some fond memories, but I am so happy that I got out of there. Waking up at 5 am every morning for four years (besides summer months) wore me down. I'm happy that I can make my own schedule now and not be treated like a child.

The brown one passed, the grey one had to
given away.

My little sisters.

On September 13th, it will be 2 years with my boyfriend. He makes me super happy. I had 2 dogs, but one had to be given away and the other had recently passed. They're not with me now, but they are still in my heart.



The forth and last meaningful number is 1,150. 1,150 are the miles between my boyfriend and I. It's long-distance, but we make it work. We started dating September 13, 2014. I have known him since 2011, but I was not looking for a relationship at 15. I wanted to find out who I was and who I was to become before I even thought about having a significant other. But now, I have grown up, I have a job, I'm going to school, and he's working on his life too. One day we will be living together, but for now we have to wait. But that doesn't mean we can't visit. May of this year, against everyone's wishes, I went to spend two weeks with him. He lives in Miami, Florida. I was not used to the constant humid weather. Hopefully he will have the chance to come to Michigan next year, I just hope he doesn't freeze to death.

Teaching him how to make salsa.